So here's my idea for a really bad movie!

The antic provost of an unidentified UCSD college speaks Italian just badly enough to be accused of cursing in Bulgarian at a weird guy sitting on the roof playing a violin!!!

And then everybody ends up dead or sad or both (or else goes to the seashore).

Do you want to hear about ANOTHER great movie idea I had? Do you, huh? Do you? Do you?

• Of course! You are an artist of incredible (if underappreciated) genius!
• Absolutely not! You are a tasteless slob. None but the damned or the daft could want anything more to do with the likes of this!